So I'm behind

I've been house-sitting for a friend, and her computer is in the basement. I don't like basements, so I haven't been online much; so I'm behind.

Suffice it to say that my 10 will be back next week. Until then, happy new year. Close out 2010, and ring in 2011, in whatever way you deem awesome!

My Top Ten Christmas Memories

Growing up Bieritz was not the stuff of opulent Christmases. There were never mountains of gifts under the tree, but Christmas was magical all the same. You want proof?

1. Stockings. Dad affixed nails into the stone wall, so our stockings always hung by the chimney with care, and each year they held an orange, an apple, and some walnuts. Usually some chocolate Santas, too. Opening to stocking was awesome. They were made of green felt, an original Patricia Bieritz design, and they rocked.
2. Decorating the church. Times have changed, but back in the day, decking those halls was the sign that Christmas had come. Hanging roping around the choir loft, putting up the mitten tree, putting red satin balls on the big tree up front ... with every addition, the place began to fill with the scent of pine and the spirit of all that is good within us.
3. The year I figured out that, on Christmas Eve, I'm pretty. The rest of the year, I may be a sow by the side of the road, but there's magic to Christmas Eve. One year, when I was a teenager still stuck in a horribly long awkward stage, I had a red velour dress to wear to church at 11 p.m. on Christmas Eve night. I took a bath, did my hair, put on my face and looked in the mirror ... and the young woman who looked back was strangely familiar. I saw me, but I also saw beauty. This was a first ... and it happens every Christmas Eve. I don't know about you, but I think that night brings out my absolute best.
4. Midnight parties. When we were children, my parents used to invite the entire church over to the house after the Christmas Eve candlelight service. Doesn't sound like a huge deal, until you realize the service started at 11 p.m. and got out at midnight. Beef sandwiches, relishes, that incredible punch, a big platter of cookies ... we had guests until the wee hours, and no one seemed to mind; even Mom and Dad, when we were up after only a few hours of sleep!
5. Nana's coffee cakes. It was wonderful living in a neighborhood that shared treats with one another, and our neighbor Nana made these incredible coffee cakes. We looked forward to them every year. She taught my sister Jenn how to make them, and my mom learned, too, so the legacy lives on.
6. Magi, with a twist. Back in 1993, I was out of work. Circumstances sucked, and two of my favorite gifts - a plaid taffeta skirt for myself (oh, shut up; it was cute on me in the 90s!) and a camel hair jacket for then-boyfriend Stu - had to go back. I had less than no money; I couldn't afford them. On Christmas night, Stu came over for dinner with my family and we opened our gifts. Mine were meager, because I had no job and was starting college in January. We had just finished saying our thank-yous when two additional packages arrived. His contained his jacket, and mine contained my skirt. My sister Kathie and my mom conspired to fulfill Christmas wishes that had been abandoned. It still makes me cry when I remember how thoughtful that moment was. And trust me, I was adorable in that skirt.
7. Rice's first legal drink. My best friend and brother, Mike Rice, turned 21 on December 20, 1996. (That was the year, wasn't it?) Anyway, I was still at school wrapping up stuff before heading home for the holidays, and Mike was back in Jacksonville, IL. And it sucked, because he was turning 21 and there was no one with whom to celebrate. Well, why not? I jumped in the car and headed his way, as any good sister would. I loved being in that house at Christmastime, and I loved being able to make my dear friends birthday a little more special, even if it just meant flat beer at a townie bar.
8. The opal. Years ago ... years and years ago ... my friends and I used to exchange gifts. Many were homemade. None were extravagant. Except for the year when Kelly, Patrick and Darrin gave me an opal ring - the very ring I had admired in the window at Page jewelers. I should have known, when Kelly insisted I point it out to her ("is it that one, Margaret?") over and over again, that sometime was up, but it totally flew past my head. I still have that ring. It still gives me great joy, because of the thoughtfulness behind it.
9. Christmas Eve with Diane. When we were in college, my friend Diane Schmelzel and I realized that we were heading "home" to places near each other - I to Montgomery, and she to Naperville. So we agreed that every Christmas Eve, because we would probably always venture home at that time of year, we would share breakfast or lunch together. We've missed a year or two due to illness, but it is a most welcome tradition to share with an old friend.
10. The year Mom bought Dad a new saw. She drove to Morris ... through a blinding snowstorm ... and tried to tell the story over the din of Christmas morning. It always makes me giggle to remember her shouting over our chatter, "IS ANYBODY LISTENING TO ME???"
11. Bonus reason! Not that it's a memory, really, just a feeling I have. I bet, somewhere back in the old house, where my dad, brother and sister still live, there are Christmas gifts, unwrapped, in plastic bags, hidden so well even Mom couldn't remember where she put them. She was very good at that.

Ten on Tuesday, December 14

1. I love my cat. Like, really love my cat. Which explains why I feel an extraordinary amount of guilt for the way he is not adjusting to our new, temporary digs. He and I moved about 30 minutes north for a month, to watch a friend's house and critters while she (the homeowner, not the cat) is travelling. The fuzzy dude is not handling this as well as I'd hoped. But then, this is only day one. Hopefully tomorrow will bring Good Things.
2. I'm going to learn how to snowshoe. On January 9, I'm taking a snowshoe clinic. Then, on January 30, I'm participating in a snowshoe 5k. I probably need my noggin examined.
3. This has been a hard week on the diet. Most days, I've been over on my calorie intake. I need to nip this in the bud so it doesn't get out of control, because let's face it - I like wearing pants.
4. Sometimes, things work out when you least expect them to.
5. I'm pretty good at meeting deadlines, but when I miss them, I miss them big. Things at work are flying fast and furious these days, and I totally blew past a deadline this week. I was supposed to turn copy over yesterday. I just started routing today. That is probably the first time this year that I've been in this situation, but that really doesn't help me feel any better.
6. On the good side of things, I learned last evening that my niece Kaylee in Tucson wants to spend Christmas with me. I would love to spend Christmas with her, too (not to mention her mom and dad,) and think maybe in a few years I should plan a December trip. Wouldn't it be nice to wake up on Christmas morning to a cactus, instead of two feet of snow? I mean, just once?
7. One of my favorite memories - even if I do have to share it with my ex - was of the first Thanksgiving after my mom died. We went to Tucson. We had Thanksgiving dinner outdoors. It was completely wonderful, the perfect antidote for the sadness of it being that first year sans mom.
8. I need a haircut.
9. I feel guilty because I didn't make it to the gym tonight, although I'm pretty sure getting Benld and I moved in to the Country House was the right thing to do tonight.
10. I love you. I love that you log on and read my ramblings, and I love you, just the way you are. (With apologies to Billy Joel.)

Number 10

One week ago today, I woke up and immediately began to cry. Baseball legend Ron Santo was gone. In those first moments of understanding, I felt incredible loss.

My Tucson family was here, and my crying woke them. Try explaining to a four-year-0ld why you're crying over the death of someone you've never met! But some day, she will understand. Some day, it will make sense.

When I was a little girl, my mother's love of Ron Santo didn't make much sense to me. But looking back, it's really quite simple. There was a time when the greatest players in every game played for the sheer love of their game. There were no great salaries in professional sports, but you could see the joy on their faces as they played. Watching file footage of Santo, that's what you see: joy. I think Mom identified with that.

Mom remained a Cubs fan all her life, a trait she passed on to her children. My favorite players were Andre Dawson, Jody Davis and Kerry Wood, but there was always a special place in my heart for Ron. When I would watch the broadcasts on television, I would turn the volume down so I could listen to Pat Hughes and Santo's commentary of the game. Ron loved the game as much as my mom did, so listening to him was almost like having a bit of Mom still with us.

And so today, Ron Santo was given a final sendoff. The day included a prayer service at Holy Name Cathedral, followed by a procession past the Tribune Building and around Wrigley Field. Watching the celebration of his life, I'm reminded of his courage, having followed his career dream while dealing with diabetes. His sense of humor, as a man who could laugh at his own toupee catching fire. But mostly, his intense love of the game.

We'll miss you, old #10. Thank you for sharing your joy with my mom, and in turn, with me. Heel click, and out.

Fraudulent behavior

Sometimes, I feel like an utter fraud.

I mean, if you're not a great writer, can you call yourself that, even if it is your job title?

Can you call yourself a runner if you still can't run a consistent 15-minute mile? Hell, if you can't run the full mile without slowing to a walk?

Can you call yourself a knitter when you keep ripping out rows?

Can you say you're a good housekeeper when you just found another massive dust bunny?

Can you be a good cook and only just have learned to boil an egg?

Ten on Tuesday, December 7

1. This is me, photographing a group of friends prior to the Santa Claus run on Saturday, December 4. This is also a great view of how much I love books, one of my favorite projects from college, and my leg ... which is smaller than I recall.


2. This is the whole crazy group of Santa runners - Lorna, Di, Justin, Re-Pete, Schlex, Rebekah, Mama Dee, me, Linda and Pete.

3. Same group, with our beards. Ever seen anything so awesome in your life? Didn't think so.
4. Tucson Mike, Racheal and Kaylee were here the end of last week. It was a magical visit, complete with a train ride, the view from atop the Sears Tower, lunch in the Walnut Room (accompanied by the worst server in the history of the planet,) almost skating at Millennium Park, and dinner at Meat & Di's. But the very best part? Watching Kaylee, my little desert baby, enjoy snow. She kept picking up bunches of the fluffy white stuff, throwing it in the air, and saying "This is the best day ever." Yeah, that's enough to make an auntie's day, too.

5. Practice makes perfect. I had my first rehearsal last night for a Christmas show. All music, small cast, very fun. One weekend only, December 17 and 18. Wanna go?

6. I ran last night at the gym. It pissed me off, because I had a much better run than I did at the run over the weekend. Maybe running indoors (instead of on snowy streets) is that much easier. Maybe the treadmill is nicer to my knees. Maybe I'm a wuss. I don't know, but in a half-hour run, I actually ran 23 out of 30 minutes, which is a new record. Now I just have to increase it little by little until I'm running the whole 30 ... and then get to the point where I can handle running an entire 5k. I must be crazy.

7. But I think it might be catching. See, last weekend, several of my crazy friends gathered for this Santa run thing. And much as I know it's not just because of me, they weren't shy about telling me they never would have done it if I hadn't suggested it. Who ever would have thought that I would be the one to organize people and urge them to run? Does it make sense that the slowest runner in the bunch, who can almost but not quite squeak out a 15-minute mile, is the mastermind? Probably not. But fun is fun, and I wouldn't trade it for the world.

8. There's also a hidden benefit to being the slowest in my group: I get a cheering section! I can't explain how amazing it felt to have my friends cheering me on at the end of the race. They make me realize I can finish. I love them for that.

9. I also love Christmas music. But not the crap they play on 93.9 here in Chicago. It's the same songs every time I turn it on. Do they not realize that Hall & Oates are not the only people who recorded "Jingle Bell Rock," or that many artists have covered Brenda Lee's "Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree"? Seriously. If you must play the same song every two hours or so, at least play a different version! I have about 10 different versions of each of those songs; call me, I'll share!

10. There are only 12 more get-ups until my Christmas vacation begins. Holler.