Ten on Tuesday

It's been awhile since I posted one of these. Actually, I've been a little lax on the blogging of late, and if I don't start getting back to the routine, people are going to start referring to me as "Becky." So I figure one of my goals for 2010 will be to update - really update - weekly. But why wait?

1. The bankruptcy was discharged. I have been cleared of all my debt, with the exception of my student loan and one year of Illinois taxes that the Ex was supposed to have "taken care of." I think his idea of "taken care of" meant filing and forgetting. I'm hoping to get him to pay for at least half of it. It's the least he can do after I cashed in about $10k in investments when he moved up here and had no job and needed a car and money to live on. Not that I'm bitter, mind you, but I'll be damned if I'm gonna pony up 100 percent of an expense he was supposed to take care of. I look a lot less like a doormat these days, don't you think?
2. Hot apple cider and a shot of Captain Morgan really makes me happy. I have this nasty cough, but the Apple Captain makes me feel all better.
3. I think I found a car. It's a 2001 Cherokee - not grand, just a Cherokee, and not my soft-top Wrangler, either. Now is not the time to have my dream car. Now is the time to buy what I can afford and get used to the idea of owing someone a little bit of money for a car I will enjoy driving. I hope it's still at the dealer when I get the time to go visit it. Cross your fingers!
4. It's becoming much more of a reflex for me to decide to be happy, and focus on the good instead of the things that make me want to poke myself in the eye with my knitting needles. So many of the people I run into in my daily life are hell to live with during the snowy season, and today I just kept thinking, "You live in Chicago, one of the most beautiful cities in the world. Snow does not come as a surprise. Snow comes with the territory. If you don't like it, move." From my window right now, the snow is heavy in the branches of the tree right outside and a blanket of white covers everything as far as I can see. It is beautiful and perfect and I wouldn't have it any other way.
5. Cancer sucks. My friend Jon's partner Steven just discovered cancer of the esophagus just a month or so after they got back from their honeymoon. (And let me tell you, the gay boys know how to throw a wedding!) My sister is hoping for good news after the bone marrow biopsy last week; please let the leukemia be in complete remission! And I know there are more that I just don't know about. For anyone who has battled this horrible disease, or loves someone who has, I salute your strength.
6. Speaking of strength, I've been weight training more. Maybe that explains why the weight isn't dropping off on the scale ... or maybe that's because I've also been baking cookies. Either way, I'm starting to find my muscles. I like it. There's a six pack in there; it's just behind the keg.
7. A few weeks ago, my Tucson family was here. After they left, I went through the process of decorating for Christmas. It made me miss them more and drew them closer to me, all at the same time. When I'm on the phone with them and I hear Kaylee's voice, it just fills me with glee. So many babies have come into my life since that time four years ago when Christopher drifted away ... so many signs that there is life after love ... so many little beings who call me Auntie. I am the luckiest person I know.
8. Sometimes members of my actual family make me want to bang my head against a very large brick wall.
9. Have you seen those candles with the wood wick? They sound like a fire when you burn them. It's a little disconcerting, until you get used to it, but it's really cool!
10. I'm not shopping this year. At all. I'm knitting a few tiny projects, but I'm not buying anything for anyone. This is not the year for Maggie to be spendy; if I've learned anything in 2010 it's that the people who love me don't want stuff - they want me, whole and healthy, in their lives. So, you've got me! Do not shake before opening!